Because Making
America Pay Again
Never Looked so Good.
Tariffz.
Bold Leadership.
Bold Prices.
Bold Fashion.
Welcome to Tariffz, where we're taxing your patience but not your wallet! We've slapped taxes on foreign goods so you don't have to think about where your fashion comes from. (Spoiler: it's still China, but we've got really good paperwork that says otherwise.)
At Tariffz, we believe in the principles that made this country almost great: overcharging for basic items, blaming other countries for our problems, and looking absolutely fabulous while doing it.
WHY CHOOSE TARIFFZ?
AMERICAN MADE MAYBE: By Americans who may or may not have been born here, but that's not something we talk about in the breakroom.
QUALITY ASSURED: Each product undergoes rigorous testing to ensure it can withstand at least four years of intense scrutiny.
PATRIOTICALLY PRICED: Yes, our products cost 25% more than our competitors, but that's what we call "domestic product protection," not "padding our profit margins."
PATRIOTIC ACCOUNTING: We send 40% of our profits to organizations that suddenly became "charitable causes" when their government funding mysteriously disappeared overnight.
Diplomatic Relations
Open lines. Closed minds.
Want to negotiate? Think you’ve got what it takes to initiate contact with Tariffz HQ? We’ve implemented a rigorous communication protocol -- loosely inspired by our nation's foreign policy: vague, delayed, and mostly for show.
Fill out this form and one of our highly trained response operatives (who may or may not be interns with questionable political science degrees) will get back to you within 3–5 business days.
NOTE: By submitting, you agree that your info might be used for fundraising purposes, impromptu polling, or cited in a future press release stating that “millions of people” agree with us.
Our products might be funny, but our service is serious. Tariffz prints per order, stands by its stuff, and won’t ghost you like a senator during scandal season.